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HMPF?
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HMPF?
jcandleattic
Well-Known Member
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ahhhhhhhh! Now I just feel dumb. HMPF.
jcandleattic
Well-Known Member
patty smigiel
New Member
These kids are maybe 3-4 years old to about 6..there are some toddlers too. I dont have the heart unless someone is really being a problem, then I intervene like their grandma.....
justjacqui
Well-Known Member
My gripe is my in-laws bad behavior when we had them over for brunch for my partner's birthday on the weekend. One BIL and SIL played on their phones for most of the time they were there and barely said anything. The other SIL kept bringing up topics that would make my other BIL rant about anything and everything including how everyone is out to get Trump (we don't even live in the US). My Mother in law kept talking about the problems getting their new fence despite repeating that she didn't want to talk about it and my FIL kept going on about his conspiracy theories about the moon. Needless to say that when my BIL decided to leave because my partner told him he didn't want to hear about Trump we were quite happy for it to be over. 
I buy on Amazon regularly. Ebay too <gasp!!!>
Just thought I'd throw that out there!!!I feel ya. We can't have a nice gathering without the Trump/politics lovers droning on and onnnnn. It's so irritating!!! Love me a good conspiracy theory thoMy gripe is my in-laws bad behavior when we had them over for brunch for my partner's birthday on the weekend. One BIL and SIL played on their phones for most of the time they were there and barely said anything. The other SIL kept bringing up topics that would make my other BIL rant about anything and everything including how everyone is out to get Trump (we don't even live in the US). My Mother in law kept talking about the problems getting their new fence despite repeating that she didn't want to talk about it and my FIL kept going on about his conspiracy theories about the moon. Needless to say that when my BIL decided to leave because my partner told him he didn't want to hear about Trump we were quite happy for it to be over.
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The MOON though? That's classic. It good to see the oldies coming back in style!.... and my FIL kept going on about his conspiracy theories about the moon. Needless to say that when my BIL decided to leave because my partner told him he didn't want to hear about Trump we were quite happy for it to be over.
Zany_in_CO
Saponifier
Lol, I've applied the "Thumper" Rule when dealing with sibling interactions regarding my grandchildren. I love that rule!!
I don't blame you! Way to make an employee feel so unimportant, sorry.
How sweet of you to give such details--the careful dosing to be able to take some b/4 bed and also the detailed description for getting out of bed.
From someone who is pretty eaten up with osteoarthritis, I feel your pain. Specialists couldn't believe how many joints are affected (spine as well) to be as young as I was 10 years ago when I began to seek surgical help. My grandma had it but she quit moving due to all her pain and her joints froze up to where she could only barely move one finger. Broke my heart to see that.
I really, really hope you get better and it doesn't linger or become a reoccurring thing due to what you did.
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Lin19687
Well-Known Member
It's Friday and I have to go to work
Plus, the Boss is a B this week with , again, bringing in her attitude to work and spreading it around
Plus, the Boss is a B this week with , again, bringing in her attitude to work and spreading it around
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DKing
Well-Known Member
We recently moved my father in law from one retirement home (independent living) to a better one. He was in the last place for 8 months. When he moved in, there were new berber carpets put in immediately before he moved in. When we were moving him out they said that they would be in charge of cleaning his carpets and would take a 85 dollar fee off of the damage deposit to pay for the carpet cleaning. We got a message that his carpets could not be cleaned and that they ripped them out and were installing new ones and that we owed them $1600. (which was conveniently the amount of the damage deposit) They did not allow us to see the stains and said the carpets were on the way to the dump already. My husband rushed down there and told them to bring back the carpets, which they did as the man had not reached the dump yet. My husband could tell there had been no attempt to clean them...they just ripped them out. We took the dirtiest portion and brought it home and I cleaned it myself in minutes. It came out with fresh water as it was only a bit of tea he had spilled where he sits on the couch....which does not stick to olefin carpet. Carpet looks brand new...which at 8 months old, it is brand new. I wonder if this company does this every time someone moves out regardless of how long they were there. Seems very horrible for the environment to throw away all this new carpet into the landfill. We are definitely planning to fight the fee charged. We will go to the media if we have to. Talk about taking advantage of vulnerable seniors. We were paying 3200 per month for a tiny suite and his meals....which he was always hungry after so we also had to buy him groceries as well. He is 145 lbs and 83 years old, so not a huge appetite, but they still did not feed them enough, especially considering how much we were paying for this service. He said the food was horrible too. It is terrible how these establishments will take total advantage of seniors.
I'd check into the legality of them charging the $1,600 because all states have laws in which those 'renting' to others MUST follow when a renter moves out in order to keep part or all of a 'damage' deposit. My husband and I watch a lot of judge shows because there isn't much to watch--we have the lowest/cheapest TV program package with Dish. Many times those renting try to rip off the renter and get a tounge lashing from the judge(s). Also, there is 'normal' wear and tear and the fact that after a certain time carpet cleaning and painting of an apartment is just part of the 'normal' upkeep of the apartments that the judge doesn't even have the renter foot that bill. I'm certain there is someplace (department/office) where you can call and speak to someone, or check the internet for rules and laws that this company/person is bound by. We have watched SO MANY in which the cost of painting is on the company/person and NOT the renter. Even charging you the $85 might possibly be not legal because I know some of these (or all of them) would ask, "Did you try just spot cleaning? Just how much does it cost to use a brush and a little carpet cleaner from a can to clean that one spot?!!" And then you'd hear, 'Your case is dismissed."
@DKing I forgot to mention something important. It is advantageous to take photos of all the rooms now of your father-in-law's new place. Keep them somewhere safe for future needs if something like this happens. Since cameras / phones all take digital now and not film there's no actual cost if you take a photo of each side of the rooms. For instance, stand in the middle and face the north wall and take a photo, turn to the east wall and do the same. Taking photos of all the walls will give you a good record of what the 'total' room looks like. Also, I'd stand at one end of the room and take a photo or two of the flooring. I hate to get really picky, but for me, I'd take pics of all the appliances as well. When you get ready to move, shortly before the exit, do the same. This then gives you an exceptional record of what things looked like at or right before move-in and then what appliances, cabinets, counter, carpet, and walls looked like at time of move-out. This way they CANNOT rip you off!!! Any court cases we watched, any time the one who was trying to get moneys or keep moneys there weren't intitaled to, they LOST. Solely because the renter took good before AND after photos.
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DKing
Well-Known Member
@Michele50 We are definitely planning to look into the rules for rentals. I am pretty sure that they know that they were in the wrong as they tried to negotiate with my husband when he went down there. They allowed us no opportunity to come and look at the carpet that was "ruined" before they ripped them out. They said that there was glue on the carpet (there wasn't) and they tried to say the carpets were already at the dump so we could not see them. This was all over the phone. When my husband showed up 10 minutes later, they were magically able to produce the carpets as they could tell he was very mad about how they went about things. We were expected to trust them that they attempted a cleaning (obvious they did not) and that the carpets weren't salvageable. With a handheld home cleaner, I got them spotless in minutes. They literally look like brand new carpet. 8 months wear on berber is not very detectable, and like you said, that is part of the natural wear and tear which is not allowed to be deducted from a damage deposit. They won't have a leg to stand on with this so we will do what it takes....either sue them, and/or go to the media, if they attempt to keep that $1600. And the carpet replaced was maybe 300 square feet max worth, of low quality berber. There is no way that cost 1600 so they are not only trying to rip him off by saying the carpet was damaged, they are adding a huge premium to what they replaced. I would imagine that others would come forward with similar stories if this got out.
The new apartment has all new carpet too... a beautiful brand new building. My sister in law already went out and purchased area rugs for every area he frequents to protect them. These are much nicer and higher quality carpets for sure.
The new apartment has all new carpet too... a beautiful brand new building. My sister in law already went out and purchased area rugs for every area he frequents to protect them. These are much nicer and higher quality carpets for sure.
LOL, whether I sued or not, I'd be very tempted to go to the media so they are held in the light and think twice about doing this to others. So sad, and I was upset for you guys. People have just lost the sense of decency and treating others with honesty that use to be the norm. Crooks is what many are and, sadly, one can't trust anyone. People (not all, but most) once lived where their word was binding and handshakes were honored; not so much these days. Even when written contracts are in effect, some still try to swindle others. It's downright awful that this is done to anyone, let alone our dear older family and friends.
So glad that your hubby was able to get there in time, all that (the lies that were told to you both) will be evidence if it goes to court. You guys shouldn't have to pay a dime. KEEP that piece of carpet.....maybe you did but I wish you took a video (or at least photos) of it before and after washing it. I'll be rooting for you guys. I hope your father-in-law loves his new place; it sounds really nice.
My dear Aunt of 93 lives in one of these 'apartment' places and NO, they don't feed them much. I had a daycare in my home for 11 years and ran it quite business-like so the Federal Food Progam dictates how much we must feed (per age) of each food group. When we purchased a large Childcare Center I applied for the food program for daycare centers and guess what??? Yeah, the amounts of food per food group were the same. The only thing that had changed was I now had a facility rather than a home daycare so it was the same program/same rules, just different branches. I'm certain that the apartments are going by the program they are affiliated with but they ARE ALLOWED to feed more. These programs offer the least amount of food and when I started my daycare in my home I then understood why my youngest son was always famished when he arrived home after school!! These programs (all of them) state one must feed at least x amount but they don't require us to feed more. Well, I DID. I didn't fatten up those I had in my home daycare or my daycare facility but the minimal amounts were JUST RIDICULOUS. I had employees come from other centers who were shocked at the meals we served. They told me how meager the meals were at the center(s) they had worked at. AND for snacks, we often served things like chili, mac/cheese, chicken chunks and other 'meal' type foods. All the centers ever served for mid-day or afternoon snacks were popcorn, cake, crackers, etc. Kids, just like our elderly, need quality meals.......not just veggies, fruit, protein, but enough of it. That costs money and I can attest, it costs a boatload of money. Next to salary, we spent more money on food than anything else .....and those kids had all kinds of learning tools. Food was important to me in the care of those God allowed me to watch over and be entrusted with. I've visited my dear aunt (3.5-hour drive) at her 'apartment' place and know how little they are fed
and these places aren't set up with any cooking things, not even a microwave; there's a sink in the kitchen but nothing else. My aunt has a tiny (dorm-type) refrigerator and a small microwave. I'd get her an electric cooktop with 2 burners if she were interested in preparing food for herself but she's not. She weighs about 95 lbs and eats just small amounts. That's good because they don't feed them much!! I've seen others go over to the fruit area and stash some fruit into their purse or pockets during meal time so they can have them for later . Not sure if this is 'acceptable' but I ain't tellin on them.
DKing
Well-Known Member
@Michele50 We are in Canada, but I have to assume that we have similar rules regarding rentals. I often read about landlords feeling like the laws are unfairly in favor of tenants and tenants can get away with abusing the system. I will imagine that what they have done is highly unethical and illegal. Being that all this retirement home's clients are elderly, they probably are taking advantage of the fact that disputing these things are more than the elderly want to have to deal with, or can due to cognitive decline. I will bet that this happens a lot, especially in this particular home. We have not told my father in law about what has gone on as he would be highly distressed about this situation.
We do have before and after pictures of the carpet. When my husband went there and demanded to see the damage to the carpets, they showed him all the carpet cut into large squares. He found the piece that they said could not be cleaned and said that he was taking it and if it came clean, that deposit better be returned. I have after pictures of it now, and the clean carpet to show as evidence. There should be no way that they can dispute that this carpet is clean as it genuinely looks brand new.
My father in law is very happy about the serving sizes in the new place, and the quality of the food. He was ecstatic that he finally felt full. He has access to a full salad bar for his meals as well. At the last place he was lucky to get a tiny portion of salad a couple times a week. The shocking part is, the price is actually slightly cheaper at the new home. It is definitely a better environment too. He constantly had drug addicts shooting up right outside his room in front of his living room and bedroom windows at the last place. The people running the building made no real effort to move these people along. It is a sad world we live in these days.
We do have before and after pictures of the carpet. When my husband went there and demanded to see the damage to the carpets, they showed him all the carpet cut into large squares. He found the piece that they said could not be cleaned and said that he was taking it and if it came clean, that deposit better be returned. I have after pictures of it now, and the clean carpet to show as evidence. There should be no way that they can dispute that this carpet is clean as it genuinely looks brand new.
My father in law is very happy about the serving sizes in the new place, and the quality of the food. He was ecstatic that he finally felt full. He has access to a full salad bar for his meals as well. At the last place he was lucky to get a tiny portion of salad a couple times a week. The shocking part is, the price is actually slightly cheaper at the new home. It is definitely a better environment too. He constantly had drug addicts shooting up right outside his room in front of his living room and bedroom windows at the last place. The people running the building made no real effort to move these people along. It is a sad world we live in these days.
Zany_in_CO
Saponifier
FWIW, I'd like to mention just in case somebody is looking for a great place for their folks, my 99-year-old mother is in a facility in Phoenix AZ that is so wonderful, early retirees are grabbing up new units as fast as they can -- for the convenience and good food. Prices are comparable to what a unit costs here in CO, but what in difference in terms of management and atmosphere!
Everything is available on campus - doctors, dentists, hair salon, barber, second-hand store, gift shop, post office, etc. and there's a strip mall across the street to buy groceries, ice cream, liquor, and several other shops. A shuttle bus to take you there.
The "campus" looks a lot like a college campus. They have many amenities as well as a raised garden where residents can grow stuff and even help themselves to whatever is in season. There are 3 restaurants - A bistro for light meals; a fancy restaurant for special occasions; a large restaurant where most of the residents have their main meal at lunch time. Every table seats 10 -- no choice -- you have to engage with other people. I've never seen so many happy seniors!
https://beatitudescampus.org/
Everything is available on campus - doctors, dentists, hair salon, barber, second-hand store, gift shop, post office, etc. and there's a strip mall across the street to buy groceries, ice cream, liquor, and several other shops. A shuttle bus to take you there.
The "campus" looks a lot like a college campus. They have many amenities as well as a raised garden where residents can grow stuff and even help themselves to whatever is in season. There are 3 restaurants - A bistro for light meals; a fancy restaurant for special occasions; a large restaurant where most of the residents have their main meal at lunch time. Every table seats 10 -- no choice -- you have to engage with other people. I've never seen so many happy seniors!
https://beatitudescampus.org/
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