How do you calm lye phobics

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LuckyStar

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It happens every now and then with friends and acquaintances, and sadly, frequently when my soap comes up around my mom.

"you use lye in your soap? That's so dangerous , chemicals are bad for the body"

I've tried explaining that all hard bar soap she has ever used has made has used lye(i'm pretty sure she still uses dove) and so mine does too.

I've explained that for every lye molecule there is an oil molecule for it to bind to, and then they change into something different, soap, and my soap even has extra oil in it so there is no way it could end up with unprocessed lye. (no, ive never made a mistake..not even once *cough*). She's still nervous about my soap because it uses lye, that is the only reason she will give.

I have a 100% natural(essential oil, clay , tea and calendula)soap planed for her but when i tell her its all natural, she doesn't believe it can be so because it has lye in it. *sigh*
 
I would start with the history of lye from wood ash maybe. Then explain the only way to get consistent and safe results is with the modern version. And maybe ask her if she has ever eaten a really good pretzel. Good luck some people will continue to think what they want though☺
 
Not only pretzels are prepared with lye, bagels are also. That is what gives them their lovely chewy brown outside.

After years and years of home health, I know that some folks are not going to listen. Especially some parents. I call it the diaper reason. If they changed your diaper, you never get old enough to listen to. Then a total stranger can tell them the exact same thing, and it is brand new information that makes perfect sense, and they listen to them. Drives the children crazy.
 
"I understand your concerns, and if there were lye left in the final soap, I would agree with you it would be dangerous to use, but there is no lye left by the time the soap is finished, and it is safe. You are probably thinking of historical references to harsh lye soap, but we have better scales, blah blah I would never ever give away or sell soap that had any lye left in it, and I always test it."

But yeah....some words just never gain their real meaning in some brains. "chemical", "natural", "organic", "risk"...you know, the usual sorts of things...if you try to explain that everything is chemical, that nature makes some horribly dangerous things, that organic really just means it is carbon-based, or that risk assessment can end up showing that any risk is miniscule and just waking up each day is more dangerous.......you'll be exhausted and they won't be any wiser.

Can you just tell her you have some pure, elemental NaOH as it is found in its very simplest form, and you'll use that for her bars? lol
 
Just do not use the "evil" lye word, and small lie is required, you could always say that you used soapwort, later one when she tried the soap and she likes it, you can explain.
Sometimes lie is the way to go. Probably everyone will say that Honesty is the best way, but not always:-D
 
By definition, if it's soap, it was made using lye to turn the oils into soap. But just like the oil is no longer oil- you wouldn't cook with my Olive Oil Soap- The Lye has been changed too. What's left is Soap. IF there was still Lye in it, that would be bad. Also, I use food grade lye which is used to make: lutefisk, olives, canned mandarin oranges, hominy, lye rolls, and pretzels.
 
The trouble with irrational concerns is that they are irrational. Countering them with rational explanations rarely works particularly well. It is the nature of the problem.
 
My mom is the same way though she doesn't say it! I've given her so many beautiful bars and she just stacks them up in her drawers and linen closets. She's from Brazil and remembers washing laundry with bars that stripped the skin so badly they became raw. I told her the reasons why my soaps are different, but you can't teach an old dog... Haha *sigh*
 
Reverse psychology: Sigh with bliss as you handle and sniff THE perfect bar for the person, their favourite scent, and colour...talk about how gorgeous this one feels on the skin, like a real luxury bar....mmmmm.....sigh again, sadly, while setting the bar aside, and say "but, I know you don't want to use soap that had lye used to make it." And never offer a bar. ;)
 
Find a commercially made soap that was made with lye and put the ingredients list next to your one (you might need to put your list in to the same format as theirs) and tick off all that match. (Sodium Cocoate? Check! and so on). If they would use the commercial soap, why not yours when these ingredients match?

Then look at the ingredients that are LEFT OVER on each list and ask people which ones they would prefer to use on their bodies. I think I know which list would have the lower number of crazy sounding chemicals on it.............
 
Ditto what The Efficacious Gentleman said. Get out the labels and compare.

That is what I did when I ran into a few of the lye-phobics amongst my own family and friends. There weren't many of them, thankfully, but for the few that exhibited a fair bit of squeamishness about it- who happened to be the oldest of the bunch, btw (they probably remembered the bad old days of great-grandma's harsh lye soap)- I told them to go home and look at the ingredients list on the label of the current box of soap they were using, and then to go to their computer and look up each of the ingredients on the internet.

That was all it took to open the door up to discussion, and to make a long story short, I don't have any lye-phobics amonst my family and friends anymore. lol


IrishLass :)
 
My mom was lye phobic... So I conquered those around her first. After everyone else started talking about how great my soaps were, she caved and tried a bar. Now she is one of the first to ask for the end pieces. It took awhile but with persistence we got her over to the dark side! :)
 
Ha. Do what I did when I had a fear and accidentally splash some soap batter on yourself and realize that the tingle is not so bad and then calmly pour vinegar over it.
 
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