Do you get along with your mother in law?

[KSL]

Wow.. some of those things you think you'd only see on tv!

My MIL is extraordinarily NICE to everyone! Even people she DOESN"T like. We get to hear about it later. I always say she's nice for her own good. The only issue i have is that she allows our dog to do whatever he wants and gives him way too many treats. Its hard when you have one year old puppy you're trying to TRAIN NOT to jump on people and she comes around and lets him jump and says "thats okay" and gives him a treat! Lets just say the dog LOVES gramma......

FIL.. totally another story. Nothing is ever good enough. If we told him we bought a couch he'd say we paid too much and that it was ugly even before we told him how much or what color it was.......

I'm so sorry for all those who have really bad experiences with thier in-laws! But you have to do what's right for your OWN family!

 

[Yummo&YAsMommy]

I don't post that often but have I got a MIL story for you. I have the good AND the bad. I do apologize as this is going to be REALLY long.

Backstory: When my DH and I were first dating (2006), there was a little slip up. He was drunk one night and slept with one of his friend's girlfriend. Months later, after we reconciled, I found out she was pregnant and was saying it was his. I had my doubts from day 1 because she was only 22, already divorced once, had a couple of kids by a couple of guys that she didn't have custody of. I think she tried to pin it on him because she knew he wouldn't ask a lot of questions and would take care of her and the baby. A couple of months later I found out I was pregnant. A HUGE shock to me because I had been told there was no chance!! DH didn't tell his family about our pregnancy until I was 6 months because he was scared.

Enter MIL. She treated me like ****. She never talked to me but I always heard her talk to my DH about me. She called me every name in the book. She took the side of the other girl. I was pissed. I was the one in a relationship with her son. I at least knew who the father of my child was. We asked her to keep quiet about the situation because I didn't tell my family about the other baby. I didn't want to worry them (or listen to the lectures, I had enough to deal with) until we knew for sure. She, at my baby shower was asked if this was her first grandhild. She knew my family knew DH's siblings and that there weren't any other grandchildren. She looked at me smugly, then looked at my mom and aunt and said, "No, this is my second." Needless to say I now had to answer all the questions and listen to all the lectures. After the babies were born. I demanded a DNA test for the other baby. My MIL demanded a DNA of mine!!! That annoyed me but I agreed. The other girl kepting coming up with excuses not to get the test done. After two months we finally got it done and it turned out my DH is not the father of the other baby and IS my son's father. It actually was my MIL who finally forced her to do it. She took my DH to her house unannounced with a home testkit and supervised. After that, my MIL did begin to warm up to me but I was still very distant. Much later I found out that my MIL told her that if the baby was not his, she was to stay away from us. If she didn't, MIL would make her life a livng hell.

Flash forward to April 2008 and the birth of my DD. I went into the hospital at 33 weeks in labor. They were able to halt it but I was not allowed to leave. We were in a new city, with no friends or family so we flew her in. She took care of my son so my husband could work and stay in the hospital with me. She stayed a couple of weeks after we came home to help out. We started to talk more during that time and things improved. A couple of months later she called during the day to talk to me. She actually apologized for everything. We talked for several hours and really got to know eachother. After that, everything was great. She was very loving and supportive of all of us. She was diagnosed with cancer that summer and she hid her prognosis from everyone. She passed away this February.

In the end, my MIL realized that I love her son very much and that's all she ever wanted to be sure of.

Now my SIL is another story. She actually was upset that I was crying at the funeral. She still thinks I was the bitch in the above situation and really doesn't know what all happened because she's never bothered to ask. She also doesn't understand that I wasn't as upset for MY loss as I was for my DH and my children. Her and I will never get along but that's another story.

Sorry this was so long but thanks for reading. I hope it gives some hope to those with bad MILs.

 

[ibariaSoap]

Surprisingly, I LOVE my mother in law! She's a major sweetie. It's actually my FATHER in law who I cannot stand. (they are divorced).

 

[TessC]

Not in the least. My husband hasn't spoken to his parents in close to 6 years now, but prior to the big blow-up, his mom hated me. Don't know what happened, when we were dating she seemed to like me well enough, was friendly even. Once I was pregnant with our son, though, omg....she despised me. =/

 

[dagmar88]

So glad to read there are more girls like me!
NO! We both can't get along with her. I even forbid my husband to go visit or help her in the morning, cause he will be depressed all day
It took her about 2 years to realise I'm gonna stay, so she kinda had to accept me.
She allegedly had a problem with me being younger then her son; but her BF is 7 years younger than her
She has serious control issues, she wants to say who has to do what, when and how. Me and the hub just aren't the people to be pushed around...
She made her BF work outside in the cold for so long the old man ended up with plumonia.
After we were together for about a year she told my DH how much she missed his ex girlfriend because she would clean her house, make Christmas pieces and she always did whatever MIL asked
I have to say, my DH whole family is totally humorless, they don't enjoy life one bit and all they can talk about is (bad) food, how little money they have, how their job/work around the house is way to much, passed and coming holidays and where they have pain.
Just nagging from dawn till dusk...
My gosh, I'm on morfine 3 days a week and I don't ever nag!

My own mother is the cause of my PTSD and I haven't been in contact with her since I was 16, so my hub doesn't have to deal with a MIL from hell :wink:

 

[Deda]

It's good to see I'm not alone in the MIL saga.

She never bothered me, we just didn't have any contact. After the first year or so I stopped trying to find ways to include her in our lives, we went on happily ever after. Sadly, she didn't.

I wish it could have been different, but it wasn't.

I do have a fan-tab-ulous ex-MIL. She's a peach and I love her still. I'm fortunate to also have a wonderful mother and stepwitch. I'm certain DH would agree he's aces in the MIL dept, even my ex's mom loves him.

 

[gekko62]

Move on over Bold & Beautiful....here comes SMF!

I don't have MIL worries.My sons dad passed 26yrs ago,& he was estranged from his dad,& his mum died when he was 13. But FIL is a selfish pig.For my sons sake we would see him,but the man just couldn't be bothered,anymore than he was with his own son.Many years later my son moved to Melbourne from Brisbane & decided to contact the man.Just trying to connect & find his roots.Very hard watching him.Knew he'd be hurt but not wanting to limit him,skew his expectations. He rang his grandad,after much deliberation,& working up the courage.(this was 20yrs down the track,hadn't seem GD since he was 7)The old pig asked what did he want,as if my son was looking for a handout.Never reached out,or even bothered a follow up call.Poor kid.He's over it now,at least knows one side of the family loves him.

 

[Sibi]

My MIL tells me sometimes that she loves me more than her son (I don't believe it but she truly loves me). I can only take her in small bits and pieces because she has some annoying habits and can drive anyone round the bend in no time but she is a good person and I do love her. I don't really have to worry about seeing her though because she lives in Peru and I live in the US so I don't see her that often

 

[KigerKat]

Wow! I'm sorry to hear that some of you guys got stuck with nasty mils. I absolutely LOVE mine! I love all my in-laws. Is it sad to say that I get along better with my in-laws than I do with my own family?