Disclaimer - this post might be triggering - I'm not even sure how to describe the trigger without it being triggering. but I need to vent. Mods, if you think this post is beyond the scope of this forum, please let me know and delete. I understand.
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One week ago, I arrived at work and my co-worker (male, early 60's) wasn't there. He usually arrives half an hour before me and it was unusual. Another co-worker and I commented on it and our boss hadn't heard anything from Tim. He decided to check on Tim and drove by his house. He later reported that there was a police car and two other cars there. When he rang the doorbell, a police officer answered and let my boss know that Tim was fine but he wouldn't be at work due to an ongoing investigation.
Later that afternoon, after I'd already left (I work 5 hour-ish per day), Tim showed up to talk to our boss. The next day, we were told what he'd shared with Phil (my boss).
Here's where the trigger warning comes in.
Apparently, Tim was being investigated. His computer and all his electronics had been seized and he was being charged with possession of child pornography. His wife immediately left him (she has 4 young grandchildren) and is staying with her daughter. Justifiable, no doubt. We were all in shock. I've known this man since 2007, longer than anyone else in our organization. The next day, Tim showed up again to talk with Phil. He explained that he'd been sexually abused and that he intended to seek counselling and that he had nothing left. My boss let him know that he could not, in all good conscience, keep him on as an employee. All of us there have children and/or granchildren. Tim understood and told Phil he would plead guilty to all charges. As far as any of us know, it was only for possession of child pornography, not of abuse.
At dinner time tonight, my boss called.
Tim's stepson had called to let Phil know that Tim died today. No one is certain whether it was his heart (he'd had some very close calls and heart surgeries in the past) or whether he'd taken his own life.
Honestly, right now I don't know what I feel. I'm sad and I'm angry and I'm hurt... most of all, I'm so, so sad.
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One week ago, I arrived at work and my co-worker (male, early 60's) wasn't there. He usually arrives half an hour before me and it was unusual. Another co-worker and I commented on it and our boss hadn't heard anything from Tim. He decided to check on Tim and drove by his house. He later reported that there was a police car and two other cars there. When he rang the doorbell, a police officer answered and let my boss know that Tim was fine but he wouldn't be at work due to an ongoing investigation.
Later that afternoon, after I'd already left (I work 5 hour-ish per day), Tim showed up to talk to our boss. The next day, we were told what he'd shared with Phil (my boss).
Here's where the trigger warning comes in.
Apparently, Tim was being investigated. His computer and all his electronics had been seized and he was being charged with possession of child pornography. His wife immediately left him (she has 4 young grandchildren) and is staying with her daughter. Justifiable, no doubt. We were all in shock. I've known this man since 2007, longer than anyone else in our organization. The next day, Tim showed up again to talk with Phil. He explained that he'd been sexually abused and that he intended to seek counselling and that he had nothing left. My boss let him know that he could not, in all good conscience, keep him on as an employee. All of us there have children and/or granchildren. Tim understood and told Phil he would plead guilty to all charges. As far as any of us know, it was only for possession of child pornography, not of abuse.
At dinner time tonight, my boss called.
Tim's stepson had called to let Phil know that Tim died today. No one is certain whether it was his heart (he'd had some very close calls and heart surgeries in the past) or whether he'd taken his own life.
Honestly, right now I don't know what I feel. I'm sad and I'm angry and I'm hurt... most of all, I'm so, so sad.
