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All of these are great stories, but Kitn, this is the best:

It was a long weekend , I ran a house cleaning business and we were working that day. I was in the kitchen , warming my coffee in the microwave .I was enjoying the view of the fields out the window, when I looked down at the counter , there was my coffee cup . WTH did I put in the microwave ,I wondered. So I open the door and there are my hubby's plastic frame, expensive work safety glasses , sitting there bubbling away. OMG I am still remembered at the opticians for that , they laughed until they cried when they saw the nuked glasses.

Hahahaha, sounds like something I would do. One time when I was REALLY in a bad state of mind I went to a friends house for a party. She asked me to help get the food ready, so I was helping her in the kitchen. I really did have a lot on my mind and couldn't stay focused... all of a sudden, she yells "hey, what are you DOING???" and I looked down. I was pouring lemonade on the popcorn! (What in the heck I even thought I was trying to do, I have NO idea!) I was in the middle of a divorce and had just lost my job is my only excuse, but I sort of do stupid things all the time without an excuse.
 
when i was in High school i went with my BFF and our moms to eat lunch at burger king. when wwe arrived there the guy i'd been telling my BFF about was there. i didn't notice him at first but once i did, i dragged my friend to the ladies room to tell her and not embarass myself when she turns around to look. so anyways, we rush into the restroom and i am leaning against the door and she is right in front of me and we are talking about the guy when she leans back a few inches and gets this look on her face of horror. then she says, Krissy? are we in the right bathroom? i look and realize that we are standing on the other side of a partition of urinals! we both scream and throw ourselves against the door so that no one can come in. we quickly whisper a plan to get us out of there with out notice. we decide to throw the door open and run as fast as we can straight to the womens room. well we count 1,2.3 and then we open the door and run.....straight into the kitchen, behind the counter in front of everyone including the guy. we scream again and turn around after scaring the crap out of a couple of employees and run back where we came from...the mens room! we, at the very last second catch ourselves and turn towards the womens room at the other end of the hall, where we stay until my mom drags us out. the guy had left after our mad dash to the womens room.
 
"I just have 2 words for you baby" "Ano-Rexia!" To which his friends died laughing, of coarse, it happened at the mall.
I can only dream about someone doing that to me. I was a fat kid. No fun on the other end of the spectrum either.

I've enjoyed reading about everyone's misfortunes. I've had my fair share of falls, wearing fabric softener sheets to school, set the microwave on fire at work, set off the smoke alarm in my bldg cooking a grilled cheese, I could go on and on. I have to admit my worst fear is coming out of the bathroom w/my skirt or dress tucked into my underwear or panty hose. :(

Back in the early 90s when balerina flats were in I had a particularly slick pair and my mom, my best friend, and I were walking thru JC Penny's. They must have waxed the floor the night before because my feel slid right out from under me and my ass hit the floor registering a 3.0 on the richter scale. I got tickeled and couldn't get up. Everytime I'd try to get a foothold I'd slide. **** slick shoes! I looked around for the love and support of my mom and bf only to see my mom hiding in the clothes and my bf walking away like she didn't even notice me falling down. I had to turn over onto my hands and knees and crawl over to the carpet to get up.
 
I have one to add that just happened today, but with a differnet twist as I was the only one who wasn't embarassed. The only thing I can think is that my husband forgot this is the first week of the kids summer vacation. He was still in bed when the kids and I left to run errands and go grocery shopping (he works 2nd shift) We got home and all 3 of us had our arms full of grocery bags, before we can open the front door my husband yanks it open in this grand sweeping TADA with a big smile on his face. He was completely nude :shock: I don't know who was creeped out more my husband or my sons.
 
Chay said:
I have one to add that just happened today, but with a differnet twist as I was the only one who wasn't embarassed. The only thing I can think is that my husband forgot this is the first week of the kids summer vacation. He was still in bed when the kids and I left to run errands and go grocery shopping (he works 2nd shift) We got home and all 3 of us had our arms full of grocery bags, before we can open the front door my husband yanks it open in this grand sweeping TADA with a big smile on his face. He was completely nude :shock: I don't know who was creeped out more my husband or my sons.
OMG!!! that is so funny! i can just see my dh doing that one day.
 
Bret said:
My husband does that on purpose. Elevators, grocery stores, no place is safe.

So does mine....

Kitn yours is hilarious! I have been known to put things in the micro that shouldn't be there, but that one takes el cake-o!

Picture this: Cruise ship: a bunch of us in the hottub -
decided to head down to the room to take a quick shower before dinner. My roomie got out of the hottub first, and started walking towards the chairs where we had left our towels and stuff.
I lagged to say a few words to our other friends before getting out. I got out of the tub and "jogged" over to my friend... and yes... you guessed it. My left boobie popped right out of my bikini top. Right. In. Front. Of. The. WHOLE Pool deck full of people......
 
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