Iowa Nice.

[lenarenee]

"... I'm curious what vibe you were picking up on to make you feel that way..."

Hmm. It wasn't outright rudeness or anything like that, so you're right to call it a vibe. The most concrete thing that I can point to was their endless flow of questions, very serious, very fact oriented, very focused on their their agenda. They'd pull out a fragment of old leather strap, want to know how it was constructed, get an answer, wrap it up and put it away, pull out something else from their box, ask about it, get an answer, put it away, and so on. It seemed to me as if they had some clues about things, but they were either looking for confirmation of their ideas or for more details to flesh out their thoughts. As the hour went on, the process took on the feel of a formal oral examination.

Have you ever been at a party and met someone who can only talk about themselves, the amazing things they've done, the amazing people they've seen, the amazing things they're planning to do, etc.? Maybe the conversation flows to other things briefly, but it always comes back to that person holding court. Their stories can be interesting, but eventually you realize the speaker isn't interested in you as a person, just as a pair of listening ears. There's no room for you in the interaction -- it's all about the other person getting their needs met. It was something like that.

I wondered if it was something like that. Considering the amount of teaching and giving you do on the forum - plus the many times you've shown your astuteness with human nature, I just found the comment about your feelings interesting. You're too smart to be "taken". But you were stuck with this situation, and it didn't seem like your teacher instinct kicked in - which made me think you didn't have "students" on your hands, only people who wanted a quick fix.

If I'm being too personal, let me apologize. I was feeling a little protective of you and was frankly surprised that saying no to these people proved to be so difficult for you. Next time....look out world...DeeAnna's ready for you!!

 

[DeeAnna]

Hey, Lenarenee, thanks! It's nice to know you were feeling protective towards me -- DH says I often need protecting! You are not being too personal and no apology required. In this case, I was peeved at the situation and annoyed with myself, but nothing worse than that. Interesting that you picked up on the fact that I didn't go into full teacher-mode. I never really opened up like I do when I feel comfortable and at ease with people.

Sage on the Mountain -- "... So, I feel like a big part of learning to say "no" is directly related to sticking up for yourself and training yourself not to be a pushover so you don't get walked all over. ..."

That is so true. Well said! We're taught to treat others with respect, but when we don't treat ourselves with the same respect we give others, that's when the trouble starts.

 

[dixiedragon]

So I've been rambling all over your page for a while and talking myself into (and then out of) buying a bell. So you don't make bells, but you restore bells, and also design and make leather things that hold bells? That's neat.

 

[Sagebrush]

We're taught to treat others with respect, but when we don't treat ourselves with the same respect we give others, that's when the trouble starts.

Yes, this is exactly it! And when we don't treat ourselves with respect, it's hard to take care of (be nice) to those around us when we need to.

By the way, DeeAnna, I love your jingle bells and your leather work! Don't worry, though...I won't be trying to arrange a visit to your shop!

 

[dixiedragon]

BTW..., I've got a business idea for you. A line of leather, belled fetishwear called Jingle Freak. You're welcome.

 

[kchaystack]

BTW..., I've got a business idea for you. A line of leather, belled fetishwear called Jingle Freak. You're welcome.

It bothers me that I might know people who would like this.

 

[DeeAnna]

It bothers me that I might know people who would like this.

Um, err, well ... so do I. A few. :shifty:

BTW..., I've got a business idea for you. A line of leather, belled fetishwear called Jingle Freak. You're welcome.

And, um, well, thank you -- it's actually an idea that has occurred to me too. And now I'm gonna leave it at that! :silent:

 

[kchaystack]

Um, err, well ... so do I. A few. :shifty:



And, um, well, thank you -- it's actually an idea that has occurred to me too. And now I'm gonna leave it at that! :silent:

Haha. Do you ever go to Chicago in late May?

 

[dixiedragon]

A local tack shop near us carried riding crops where the leather part at the end was shaped like a hand. She could NOT keep them in stock. Most of the people buying them were couples. She could tell they weren't horse people. (Nothing wrong with that, just unusual in a tack shop.) They'd oh-so-casually wander in, randomly inspect cowboy hats, etc, and slowly meander towards the crops.

 

[DeeAnna]

It's truly amazing how these conversations morph! 8) 8) 8)

 

[TBandCW]

I'm really enjoying this!!

 

[Susie]

Dixie -- I am definitely setting up a fee structure for tours. I would enjoy teaching leather working even without sleigh bells in the mix.

It occurred to me that to avoid having people "stay to chat" after the tour, you could do what the day cares do, and charge $1 per minute for every minute they stay over.

 

[BlackDog]

A local tack shop near us carried riding crops where the leather part at the end was shaped like a hand. She could NOT keep them in stock. Most of the people buying them were couples. She could tell they weren't horse people. (Nothing wrong with that, just unusual in a tack shop.) They'd oh-so-casually wander in, randomly inspect cowboy hats, etc, and slowly meander towards the crops.

I snorted violently at this.

 

[Steve85569]

A local tack shop near us carried riding crops where the leather part at the end was shaped like a hand. She could NOT keep them in stock. Most of the people buying them were couples. She could tell they weren't horse people. (Nothing wrong with that, just unusual in a tack shop.) They'd oh-so-casually wander in, randomly inspect cowboy hats, etc, and slowly meander towards the crops.

Now that right there is funny.

I asked the religious tract folks a simple question several years ago.

How many of this world's wars have been started about religion?

They have not been back.
I don't get the various solicitors any more.