I hate it when dh travels

[JanelleTrebuna]

My dh is traveling for work this week. He travels probably 2 or three times a year.
I know how lucky I am that it isn't more often. But.... I still really miss him when he goes.
We are approaching 30 years of marriage next month. I guess I've gotten spoiled.
There were so many long separations the first 18 years--with training academies, moves, etc. We jokingly say we lost about a year and a half (at least) of our marriage. (and when we were dating--we spent an entire year apart--he was serving in the AF in Germany and I was completing my Senior year in HS)
On a positive note, I'm glad we enjoy being together, and dislike being apart. Its truly a blessing--especially after so many years together.
And, as I said, I know how incredibly fortunate I am that he isn't away for long periods of time any more...been there... done that...got the tshirt...hated it

Anyone else really dread the time apart with your significant other?

I guess I could use some of this time alone in the evening to soap.... It might take my mind off missing him.

Janelle

 

[shunt2011]

Nope, wish my husband would go somewhere for a week or two. He used to go away for pleasure (fishing, hunting) and I loved my alone time. Well, he quit doing that so now if I want some me time I have to go somewhere. Otherwise we are together 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year. I love him but I need some me time and would love to have the house for a week or so to just do what I want to do instead of what needs to be done.

 

[JanelleTrebuna]

Lol. That seems to be the predominant theme with most women I talk to; especially if they have been married more than a few years.
We actually work together at the same hospital--ironically, next door to one another (although we started off 2 floors apart).
So we commute together, probably spending more time with each other than the average married couple.
For us, it just works. And I'm an introvert, so wanting to spend time with anyone is a huge compliment- lol!
They say we all need one person---he is mine
We actually have more (minor) friction when we aren't together all the time. I jokingly say our "chis are out of alignment"

Janelle

 

[IrishLass]

I hate being apart significant amounts of time from my hubby. We've been married 34 years and are blessed to have one of those 'kindred spirit' relationships where it's hard to know where he ends and I begin, and vise versa. In the first 10 - 15 years of our marriage he used to have to travel for work a couple of times a year and be away for about a week each time, and we both hated it. Thankfully, the job that he's had for the past 15 years does not require him to travel and it allows him to be able work from home twice a week.

That's not to say that I don't appreciate having some alone time or some friend-time with the gal pals, though. Those hubby-free hours when he has to go into work at the office are nice for me (I'm able to get more stuff done)....and those 2 nights a week when he's away for a few hours at his concert band (he plays trumpet) and at his bowling league are also nice, but truth be told, I like having him around more than having him away. He's truly my best friend and confidant and I really enjoy spending time with him.


IrishLass

 

[amd]

I'm the one who travels for my job - once a year, although last year I got out of it because I couldn't get my personal schedule to line up with China production schedules - I'm slated for a 2 week trip this year and hubby is already telling me he misses me. I don't mind the time away, I miss him terribly, but being somewhere else makes it a bit easier because I'm not in my usual spaces. I think if roles were reversed and he was the one traveling I'd have a hard time with it. In our daily life we have our separate spaces and hangout places around the house, but we're allowed into each other spaces so if I want to crash his TV time or whatever he's doing, it's totally fine. But if there's something going on outside the house, we typically do it together - he calls me his wingman, and often won't go without me, or if he does go he cuts it short. We're both introverts, with me being the social introvert. Fortunately, with 4 kids he does manage to keep busy while I'm gone!

 

[DeeAnna]

My Mister, even though you'd never guess it from what he does for a living, can have a very hard time doing things on his own. I ended up doing things that he wanted to do mainly because I knew he wouldn't do them if I didn't go along for support. As we've traveled more and he's gotten more comfortable visiting unfamiliar places, he's gotten more confident about venturing out on his own. He even went to Atlanta, Georgia, for a fun 3-day event without me -- that was a real breakthrough!

If I know DH is having fun or doing something that he wants to do, I'm okay with him being gone for a few days. And I think he's okay if I'm gone for a few days to an interesting or fun event. I think short periods spent apart can be rejuvenating, because it energizes us and sparks up our relationship a bit -- we look at each other with fresh eyes and appreciate each other more, if only because we have lots of stories to share.

It gets harder to deal with being apart much longer than that. I was gone from home for about 10 days when my Mom had a stroke several years ago. It was rough not having my own space and routine for that long and not being around my Mister and the comfort and companionship he provides. Coupled with the major stress I was feeling about my mom, well, I didn't do so well.