I have two sons, one of whom is disabled. He is an adult and lives in our native state of California, USA. He used to be employable, but is no longer capable of maintaining a job, so depends completely on his disability check for living expenses and Medicare (administered in the state of California under the Medi-Cal program) for his health services.
Unfortunately he is also not capable of handling his own finances and requires a representative payee, which I have been for him for a few years. Prior to that it was my father for many years, my husband for awhile, various friends, and a professional payee (one who does it for a living and handles the money for several clients, for a monthly fee from each).
It is a responsibility I do not cherish, by any means, and I wish he could manage his own money. As I get older and his money troubles wax and wane, I consider that this is not something I can continue to do into old age, just as my father before me said about it a few years before his death. But it does help maintain some contact with my son which was something that was lacking for many years, so in that respect it feels like it offers us both a reason to stay in touch. Plus he actually asked me for this help (being his payee) and that is something he had never done as an adult; ask me for help. I felt it was a positive step in our relationship and it does seem as though we mended a lot of fences at that point. So thinking that I cannot continue in this role for much longer gives me pause.
Today he called me to ask if I would call his Medi-Cal worker because for some reason his Medi-Cal was inactivated and he could not get his prosthetic leg replaced, after several visits to get the mold made and so on and so forth. He was understandably desperate. Several months ago I got a letter saying his Medi-Cal would be suspended if such and such paperwork wasn't submitted by such and such date. I contacted him and we did that within the required time frame, and still this happened. So frustrating. It's no wonder he is always in crisis. Anyway, I told him I would call her and what I was going to say. I'm a Nurse; I know what to say to get action, but wasn't sure I'd be able to actually speak with her directly. I called his Medi-Cal worker and told her that I was his Representative Payee and understood that all the required paperwork had been submitted and yet he was still being denied care, so what did we need to do to get his coverage activated again and prevent hospitalization. Because that was where he was going to be if he doesn't get his prosthetic leg asap, and hospitalization is far more costly than a prosthetic leg.
What do you know? I got a call back within two hours assuring me that he can go to the doctor, get his prosthetic leg and that his coverage is now activated and will be 'in all systems' tomorrow. It's already in their system today, but it 'takes time' to get it into all systems. What's up with that? Don't the systems speak to each other? Why are they not using a Relational Data Base? Oh, well. Anyway, he can get his prosthetic leg replaced at last and that is a good thing.
I wish I could make his life easier. This is not the first time that he has called me and asked me to call someone to help make things happen that should not require my intervention. It is sad. Someday I will not be around as I expect he will outlive me and who will be there for him?
Unfortunately he is also not capable of handling his own finances and requires a representative payee, which I have been for him for a few years. Prior to that it was my father for many years, my husband for awhile, various friends, and a professional payee (one who does it for a living and handles the money for several clients, for a monthly fee from each).
It is a responsibility I do not cherish, by any means, and I wish he could manage his own money. As I get older and his money troubles wax and wane, I consider that this is not something I can continue to do into old age, just as my father before me said about it a few years before his death. But it does help maintain some contact with my son which was something that was lacking for many years, so in that respect it feels like it offers us both a reason to stay in touch. Plus he actually asked me for this help (being his payee) and that is something he had never done as an adult; ask me for help. I felt it was a positive step in our relationship and it does seem as though we mended a lot of fences at that point. So thinking that I cannot continue in this role for much longer gives me pause.
Today he called me to ask if I would call his Medi-Cal worker because for some reason his Medi-Cal was inactivated and he could not get his prosthetic leg replaced, after several visits to get the mold made and so on and so forth. He was understandably desperate. Several months ago I got a letter saying his Medi-Cal would be suspended if such and such paperwork wasn't submitted by such and such date. I contacted him and we did that within the required time frame, and still this happened. So frustrating. It's no wonder he is always in crisis. Anyway, I told him I would call her and what I was going to say. I'm a Nurse; I know what to say to get action, but wasn't sure I'd be able to actually speak with her directly. I called his Medi-Cal worker and told her that I was his Representative Payee and understood that all the required paperwork had been submitted and yet he was still being denied care, so what did we need to do to get his coverage activated again and prevent hospitalization. Because that was where he was going to be if he doesn't get his prosthetic leg asap, and hospitalization is far more costly than a prosthetic leg.
What do you know? I got a call back within two hours assuring me that he can go to the doctor, get his prosthetic leg and that his coverage is now activated and will be 'in all systems' tomorrow. It's already in their system today, but it 'takes time' to get it into all systems. What's up with that? Don't the systems speak to each other? Why are they not using a Relational Data Base? Oh, well. Anyway, he can get his prosthetic leg replaced at last and that is a good thing.
I wish I could make his life easier. This is not the first time that he has called me and asked me to call someone to help make things happen that should not require my intervention. It is sad. Someday I will not be around as I expect he will outlive me and who will be there for him?
