@bookreader451, so sorry for your loss. When I lost my Mom, the first year was the hardest, especially during the holidays. She always planned these big get togethers. I come from a rather large family and we had each other to lean on.I haven't been inspired. The holidays depressed me since I lost my mom and dad in rapid succession in 2018. I did see something I might try. Sorry for the bummer post. Just really feeling it this year and miss the forum.
I hope you have others you can gather solace from, you will be in my prayers.