R.I.P. my beloved Abe cat

Man, I'm hurting bad. A neighbour just rang our bell to say he found our cat (of 6 years) dead on his property. My hubby, who is stauncher than me, and less of a cat lover, offered to go with a shovel and brought him back in a bag. He says we should do a ceremony.

I am stuck to my chair in grief and shock. This cat was my gardening buddy, a gentle giant; loved to come for walks with me. But he also loved to roam, and refused some nights to come in when I called. It was inevitable that this would one day happen.

but it still hurts - real bad.

Diane, I'm so very sorry. If I was there I'd give you a hug.

I'm so sorry Diane...

Oh gee, and so young...

Diane big hugs and thoughts your way

Awe... it's always a sad thing to lose our friends like that. I hope you feel better soon. Hugs

awww babe sooo sorry to hear that

(((((((( WOODI ))))))))) ( Hugs from Ian)

Woodi hugs from me to. It's nice you have a pic of him. I lost one a couple months ago sad day.

I know it hurts... and I wish there was something I could say to make it hurt less... but of course there isn't. Just know I'm thinking good thoughts for you and sending them your way.

It's almost 3 weeks later now, and I'm still not over it. Was NOT able to shed even one tear for him - the hurt has been deep and buried. I think it's because I covered up all the pain with guilt and anger at myself for letting him out at 3AM (I normally NEVER let cats out in the dark hours). But the two boy cats had been keeping me up for 4 nights in a row. The 'new guy' (had him almost 2 years now, to the others' 8 years) kept jumping on Abe's back and biting his neck.

I was frustrated and exhausted, and determined to get some sleep at long last ......so I threw both boys out (well, it didn't take any coaxing, I just opened a door and out they both leaped, into the night).
But Abe must have been tired of being jumped on by 'Frisky' and went off our property across the road, where the fisher got him.

and then I went back to bed until 6AM. Frisky cat was at the door, waiting to be let in, but Abe never came back. At 10:30 the neighbour came to our door and told us to please come and get Abe's dead body off his property.

and to make the pain worse: the other two cats are constantly looking for Abe, in all his favorite places...inside and outside.

SO I am telling myself: what I did, just to get some sleep ( and perhaps also to save Abe from Frisky's playful bites), I sent him out to die; to get torn to shreds by a vicious cat-killer. How can I forgive myself?

Please don't blame yourself ,he could just as easily met his maker during broad daylight.
I really feel your grief,l lost my beloved Buster 6 months ago and l still feel the eyes filling up when l talk about him or as now when l am thinking about him,l kept thinking maybe if l had taken him to the vets earlier he might have made it ,in my heart l knew no matter what l did the outcome would have been the same but l still felt guilty.Allow yourself to grieve if you are like me it will take a long time to get over his death but don't blame yourself ,feeling guilty only eats away at you and slows down the grieving process.
I believe in reincarnation for animals as well as humans so l know l will met all my beloved pets again one day and that thought is the one thing that has helped the grieving process for me.
My thoughts are with you.

Thanks Pauline (and everyone here)....it feels somewhat less painful when others know what we are feeling.

Everyone wants to blame themselves when something goes wrong with a child or a pet. You know you would be the 1st to pont out it wasn't the owners fault if the shoe were on the other foot. We are own worst critic...

Woodi said:

Thanks Pauline (and everyone here)....it feels somewhat less painful when others know what we are feeling.

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*hug* I think every single person who loves his/her pet as much as you obviously do have felt that way.
What you are experiencing is perfectly normal; you are going through the stages of grief... (and no, that isn't weird or strange when you've lost your cat :wink

You went through shock, that is why you couldn't cry.
Now you are going through the pain and guilt phase...

Just allow yourself to feel whatever you feel and don't try to shove your feelings under the carpet.
You'll be fine, just take your time.

Here's two little pics to chear you up a tiny bit (or at least I hope so)
Toddler me and my doggy Rascal. We were inseparatable

AWWW OMG thats so cute!~!!!! Lol

I'm very sorry to hear this Diane and so sorry that you're still hurting so. That is a lovely photo of Abe (such a cute puss) and I'm sure that you have many wonderful memories that you can fondly re-call. Abe would have known that you loved him very much and wouldn't want you to be hurting.

I lost the love of my life (Jefferson Bunny) on the 5th of December 2008 and I swear that I can still see him hopping around here sometimes. The connection and love never die. Hugs to you.